Wedding Bell Blues
By Anna Sachse - CTW Features | posted on October 05, 2012 at 9:19am
Knowing you’re not the first bride or groom to experience not-so-shiny-happy emotions on the big day is the best prevention and cure
After months spent planning your wedding, there’s an immense amount of weight on how it’s supposed to be unbelievably meaningful, romantic and fun – the best day of your life. And for some people it is.
But for others, it can end up feeling a little (or a lot) unpleasant in surprising ways: You’re more exhausted than you expected and just want your PJs and couch. You can’t stop stressing about the details coming together and whether your guests are having a good time, so you aren’t really living in the moment. Or trying to talk to 200 loved ones leaves you feeling like you’re not really talking to anyone.
If these sentiments rear up during your celebration, rest assured that they’re completely normal and common, says Anja Winikka, site director for TheKnot.com. “Don’t misinterpret it as cold feet!” Just breathe, she advises, and focus on all the wonderful things about your new spouse and the future you’ll share filled with “best days” of your life.
If your unease is triggered by an actual problem at the event (e.g. it’s 20 degrees colder than expected for your outdoor party), be open to creative solutions (bring in heaps of blankets so guests can get cozy), try to keep on your smile despite the hiccup, and know that you’ll eventually laugh about any mishaps later, says Ashley Hotka, who is married to her high school sweetheart and works with numerous couples at her wedding and events-only floral shop, Good Earth Floral Design Studio, in Kansas City, Kan. You also can prevent the stress in the first place by investing in a day-of-coordinator, Hotka adds.
Keep in mind that you may also feel a surprising – but positive! – sense of accomplishment. “And relief is definitely something every bride feels,” says Winikka, be it because everything went perfectly or because it’s just plain over.